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Out into Sunlight

Determination creeps up on me and pounces
Like a lion snatching its prey from the jaws of indifference.
Till now I have simply existed—
Wandering from day to day with some bewilderment,
Wondering if my days held any real substance.
It’s a terrible state to be in.
That tepid, tasteless miasma blankets everything
Until I can’t tell what the point is:
Wake, eat, work, eat, function minimally, sleep, begin again.
Somehow, though, I sense I am coming out into sunlight.
My mind feels sharper.
My eyes seem clearer.
My ears are more finely tuned to hear Your voice.
Speak, Lord. Your servant is listening.

Love (for John)

I find myself thinking of you a lot, and I do mean A LOT.
You are on my mind a goodly portion of Every. Single. Day.
How you look, things you say,
The affectionate way you… surround me…
Like the shoulder rubs in the mornings,
Or the frequent, extended hugs in the evenings.
It’s so very odd in one sense.
It doesn’t have the same euphoric feel of being “in love,”
Yet I could easily call it that and be accurate.
All these years since we met and I’m still happy with you.
Sure there are the goofy little things,
But I love being your audience when you play guitar.
I love the heart of gold that motivates you to preach the gospel.
I love the way you play with your beard,
Stare into my eyes and smile at me.
I just plain and simply love you.
I couldn’t imagine life without you, Love.

Spring Rain

The spring rain comes sweeping in
With its majestic clouds stacked high
Bringing the sweet smell of moist green—
Green grass, green trees, green bushes dripping
As the fields and flowers rejoice in another wet day.
The thunderheads pile on each other
With clear lines and wispy edges
In so many shades of gray it hardly seems gray—
The master potter shaping them all into such fantastic forms
It makes it hard to drive sometimes.
I just want to look at the sky,
See the beauty hovering above everything.
I love the rain, too…
Splashing down in everything from occasional drops
To pouring buckets steadily giving us more water.
Don’t get me wrong…
I love sunny days, but today I’m enjoying the rain.
Let it come and water my soul
With the pleasure of plenitude.


Meditating on you, Lord, takes effort, I have found.
You are so… present in every moment,
Yet so far away from my thoughts.
How can I, small-minded as I am,
Keep refocusing on the greatness of you—
Your love, your grace, your mercy, your kindness?
I just want to be aware and sensitive,
So that when you move, I follow;
When you speak, I speak;
When you are silent, I wait on you.
There are no words sufficient to express
The magnificence of your intent towards us.
You beckon us to be part of your purposes in the earth,
While I just wonder if I can get through the day.
O Lord, forgive my self-focused attitude.
Help me to be more outward in my posture…
Loving you… loving my neighbor…
Remind me that it’s not “all about me,”
But truly all about you and your love for your children.
You reach for me, and I shy away in fear of retribution,
But I want to reach back in response,
Realizing you created me as I am—
To need your impetus to move forward.
You give me the faith to trust, and
All I can do is to fall into your hands again.
When my own efforts fail to remember you,
You still come to mind.
In the mundanity of my daily strivings,
You remind me that you still love me,
Even though I can never quite figure out why or how.
I am grateful…
And I still love you,
Because you loved me first.

Light in My Darkness

In all the low places,
In all the high places,
In every space I feel alone,
Still you are there with me.
When I wonder where you are,
Your presence holds me close—
Despite my fear, despite my doubt,
Despite the numbness pervading me.
I made a choice long ago to trust regardless, and
You… steadfastly faithful… stand true!!!
What I know to be truth
Is the solid rock of WHO. YOU. ARE.
So, I stand firm in the stormy seas
Of my ennui and lethargy,
Though I feel swamped over,
Mired down, buried under…
I know you fight for me, Jesus.
I trust that there’s light at the end of this tunnel,
Because you are the light in my darkness now.


There’s a murmur in my heart
Like the roar of the ocean
Underscoring every breath, every heartbeat—
The vibration of your reckless love
Rushing into every empty space,
Filling me up again till overflow comes.
O Lord, let my gratitude and praise
Come out in my words and actions.
Let my voice vibrate your love
To those who surround my life.

On the Way

Holy Spirit, sometimes I despair that
I will ever find a deep, lasting change;
Then your hope rises up in me again,
Reminding me that this journey is just that—
A path from here to there.
I am not here or there…
I am on the way.
Change will come, because that is the nature of living!
Static states are only temporary.
They may feel permanent, but they are NOT!!
You are a God of transformation and power…
Stronger than my circumstances,
More powerful than my old nature.
I choose life once more.
I choose newness over and over—
Over all the stagnancy that surrounds me.
The surface seems still and unmoving,
But in the depths your vibrations trouble the waters
Until your mighty waves wash through me—
Shaking me up repeatedly,
Loosening all the crustiness of illness and depression,
Flooding me with joy!
Come, Lord Jesus, with your blood.
Wash me clean again.
Father of Lights, banish the darkness in me.
I only want to reflect your life to those around me.

At the End of Every Path

Countless times I am drawn again
To the matchless wonder of who you are,
Reminded over and over again that you are God—
The Father who spoke life into the void,
The Son who spoke life to a buried body,
The Spirit who speaks life daily to each heart.
No matter how my mind wanders,
I find you at the end of every path—
The rose in full bloom when I thought
There would only be a budding flower…
Because fullness of life is all that you contain,
From two cells joining to a fully grown human adult.
There is abundance in you,
Even in paucity of resources,
Because it’s all yours from beginning to end—
First, last, and everything in between.
O Lord God, be the all-encompassing presence
We need you to be in our lives;
But more than that, Jesus,
Help us to know your presence in every moment.

Every Morning New

Every morning new, O God…
Your compassions never, ever fail.
Your greatness encompasses the universe
In abundance we could never fathom,
Yet you see us in our finite existence.
You know that we are like grass, and
You pour out your lovingkindness on us.
You whisper the sweetness of your love,
Covering our sins and failures
By the power of your brokenness and blood sacrifice—
Offering us your resurrection power,
Giving us the gift of eternal life in your presence.
O Lord, there is no praise big enough
To be enough for you,
Yet you remind us again and again…
Your compassions never, ever fail.
They are new every morning!

Spring Comes Softly

Spring comes softly like a sleeper slowly waking.
The trees and flowers start shyly showing splendor
In hopes the cold has really left for the year.
Even knowing it will visit again, nature’s celebrating
The turning of the seasons with typical grandeur.
No holding back just in case… She’s on a tear,
Eager to display every bit of beauty she can fling forth
In layers of glory that gradually spread across the earth.