It’s such a hard thing
Knowing when it’s time
To acknowledge there’s no way…
There’s just no way
I can ever, ever, EVER
Accomplish this thing.
I try and I try and I try, but
No matter how hard,
No matter how often,
No matter how long
I beat my head against my private wall of frustration,
I have made little progress.
It doesn’t really help that
I don’t truly want to succeed…
But then again,
There’s the other part of me
That really does want success.
Tonight is one of those nights when
I also have to admit
I don’t know who I’d be
Without the struggle I’ve come to embrace
As part of the core of my being.
O God,
Be the unknown quantity in me
That makes the difference.
Holy One,
Set me on fire with desire for You again,
So I can let go of it ALL
And grasp hold of Your all-consuming love.