I wonder sometimes if I will find calm again,
Some stillness in the middle of turmoil.
I am used to being tossed and buffeted about.
I find peace on the inside when all outside
Says there should be none,
Then the unexpected pierces my heart again
In the old places of pain and
I am shredded where I can least bear it.
Still, some part of me cannot be shaken.
When I grieve most deeply,
I think of Job, who lost everything,
Yet still declared with faith,
“I know that my redeemer lives…” and
I, too, know that my redeemer lives.
With Peter, I ask the Lord, “To whom shall I go?
You have the words of eternal life.”
So, in my deepest pain I choose to trust Him.
His purposes matter. His will prevails.
His Comforter enfolds me in His arms,
Letting me weep and rage with hurt until
I am filled again with His love, His peace…
His mercy that will never give me
More than He can help me to bear.

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