I find I cannot reach for words the way I used to.
I put things down only to discover it falls short.
What I want to say, I am unable to say,
So I keep on babbling in some vain effort to express
All the mixed up cauldron of mess in my heart.
Still, I can’t not write, so I press on
Hoping that sooner or later I will find truth.
Holy God, be the inspiration I long for.
You are the only reality I need.
Teach me your ways, like Moses,
So I can pen some kind of light to those around me.
Take me out of the deep water of confusion
I have lately found myself in,
In some way I fail to understand.
Show me your glory again.
Refine my mental processes somehow,
So I can once more express my heart for you.
Help me, Holy Father, to lean into you–
To find help, hope, and healing in your heart.
Above all, Lord Jesus, bring me into your mercy,
So that as I fall and fail, I learn still.
I need you, Lord, so desperately that
I have lost all words to speak the depths of my need…
Yet, still, I yearn, I long, I reach, for some kind of wisdom.
In my lack, I beg of you, God, give me grace,
Because I can only find peace in you.