In the lean times, when communication is indistinct,
Provision feels barely adequate or sometimes insufficient,
And emotional turbulence keeps me off balance,
Sometimes all I can do is crouch down,
Pull in my arms, and wait for something to change.
I don’t feel immobilized today, not by external forces…
Just this need for stillness and silence
In some bid for clarity.
I am surrounded by a cloud of things
Trying frantically to keep my attention,
When all I want to do is find a peaceful moment
Away from all the distractions, questions, and concerns.
I still my soul once more,
Settling again on truths I have known for ages,
Ignoring the feelings of frustration and anxiety
In some attempt to remember who I am,
Whose I am, what I stand for, why I am here.
It doesn’t matter really what others think of me
Or what I think of myself.
Ultimately, only the Father’s perspective counts,
But I need reminding.
I need centering.
I desperately need to find the calm in the eye of the storm.
Jesus, be my rest in these moments.
Be the purifying force in this refining process,
So I can become me in a stronger, more vibrant sense,
As you created me to be.
Be my strong tower, as David said,
My refuge blocking out all the white noise around me,
Helping me to refocus again on you to the exclusion of all else,
Surrounding me with pure presence,
Till I can fulfill the purposes you intended for me,
Till I can hear and see and know the next right thing to do.