If I could write, I’d tell of all I know,
Which isn’t much, for all I have to show.
This sense of self inside of me,
This thing that drives me to be free,
Is just a formless mass of feelings, though…
I try to write the deeper things inside.
Though most of me prefers to run and hide.
My efforts bring a war within
(It seems like all my life has been),
Yet I am fixed on letting go of pride.
If I could write, the passion in my prayer
Would be to touch the world with all its care—
To show them God’s great love for all,
So they could help break down their walls
Releasing all the anger and despair.
I try to write so people know I’m real
With caution in expressing how I feel—
So they identify with me
(With common eyes we clearly see),
And we can lay things at His feet and kneel.
If I could write, I’d risk all that I am,
To share my love, and consequence be damned
But still I struggle hard and long
To speak or sing a heartfelt song.
Sometimes I’m sure I’ll never write again.
I try to write despite this wretched doubt,
For I must write. I cannot live without
A way to speak my mind and heart—
To show I’m weak and then impart
How self laid down receives God’s grace throughout.
If I could write…